From now on I'm going to post events from my life and that of my friends. Gossip, stories, lies. Those are the three things that I'm going to keep doing this holiday.
The wrong kind of me
Today myy dad has decided that I should come again anyway. I actually find that it's not good, because he has hurt me so much... it needs some time to get fixed. Today is my best friend Noelle's birthday. It was quite cozy, until I came back home. My mother said that I had changed and that she no longer recognized me as her child. That was so hard to hear. I started crying and screaming at her. I said to her that i'm still that same girl as 2 years a go. She started crying too, because she thinks that is changed so much in a short time. I drink, smoke and lie. She thinks that i become the wrong girl in a wrong kind of world. She's so hard on me right now that i don't want to be here anymore. i know what is best for me, i really do. But i'm young and i want to live it like the way that i want, because you only live once. So why don't you try the bad and good world and side of yourself. Is that then really so wrong?
A little introduction
There are so many things happened in my life. I'm deceived by a boy, my parents are divorced, my aunt is stabbed, my nieces and nephew were kidnapped and my father would no longer see me. So in summary, life is a mess and you need it to clean up. The words that my father said to me wander through my head, I can think of nothing else. Clean up those words goes very difficult. He is the one who has done me pain, so why would I send him a message? I see it as a rejection and somewhere I know that it's not as mean is. But the longer this takes the more I'm going to believe it is.